the next chapter begins.

Location: Singapore

My dear darlings in London and the rest of the world,

I arrived in Singapore day before yesterday evening. The weather is sweltering hot, my skin is permanently moist and the air is polluted with haze from indonesian fires. I am currently still immensely jet-lagged, and trying to settle in to being back. It's a bit different this time, because I'm probably going to be here for awhile, so I'm enjoying slowly unpacking all my possessions and decorating my room with them. It feels wierd because I suddenly have triple the amount of space that i normally had the last 3 years in university. I have the entire 3rd floor of our new house to myself, giving me 2 bedrooms and a balcony and my very own bathroom to spread my things out all over. My own bathroom! I can't remember the day I ever had my own bathroom. Actually, I never did...and It's pretty cool. I can leave my toothbrush and towel in there! Yay! I am very much in 'decorating' mode...I cant wait to spruce up my little corner of the world.

The food is good obviously. My ma must be the best cook in the world. I've had her pilao and chicken korma 4 times today. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and nightcap. Yup. And I've forced my parents to allow me to chauffeur them around in our Jeep while they run errands. Feels amazing to be behind the wheel again. Even with mum yelping in the backseat everytime I change lanes. Ha! I love driving! Now all I need to do is muster up the courage to drive around alone on Singaporean streets. I haven't been back in a year, and already I don't recognise our neighbourhood. It's gonna take some getting used to.

I must say life is easy here. As much as I hate to admit it, the standard of living is better, everything is cheaper, and this city runs so smoothly it seriously puts London to shame. The admin is so much more efficient, technology here is light years ahead of London (we got the equivalent to the Oyster card and congestion charging years ago), and frankly, when you can have an amazing meal for a mere 80p, your life is inarguably less stressful. And yet, its not enough.

i miss London.

Damn that scene from the airport will probably haunt me for awhile.

But I hate goodbyes, I just dont do them (as of today). I've probably had too many of them in my life, so from now on I'm gonna just give goodbyes the finger. I have decided the world is an immensely small place, and so long as climate change doesnt push up airlines fares, I'm gonna be okay. And my last week in London confirmed this even more so, because I realised I may be leaving an amazing city behind, but I dont need to let go of the main reason that made living in London the best 6 years of my life: the people. It was a bit of a paradox this last week. Not really wanting to call up or meet friends and family because doing so just made it glaringly real that I was leaving, but at the same time, the hugs and kisses I got from everyone and the effort they made to come see me, and make me feel better that this is not permanent, left me alot more reassured that this isnt as big a deal as I am making it to be.

And the best part of coming back: I'm finally looking for a job (and not having to worry about work permits)! Nothing has popped up yet, but I've already made some phonecalls, and things are looking hopeful! Will keep you guys posted. Fingers crossed!!!

ps: If you miss me very much, which you better do, you can keep texting me on my UK mobile number...I always keep it on me :D I also have a new Singapore number, it's on facebook.

New York, New York...

People either love or hate New York and I’ve decided I love it! How can you not love this city? The perfectly planned out streets, by gosh, no taxi driver could ever cheat you! And this city really does not sleep, unlike London (bah!). New York has a personal character that London lacks, it’s actually inhabited by NEW YORKERS. Not people from a 101 countries like London. Even though that is what makes London special too, it sometimes makes London a bit of a no mans land. But New York had a people. I hardly saw anything other than black, white, and latino and the odd far-eastern face here and there.

But I was even happier because I conquered New York on the first day. I got off my $15 Chinatown bus, without any maps, refused to feel intimidated. Made my way to the subway, and then finally to the YMCA on the West Side by asking people at every turn. I made sure not to look at anyone in the eyes, as my cousin warned, and I survived! Lol! Just kidding, New Yorkers are lovely!

I did the usual touristy stuff: World Trade Centre site, walk through Central Park, go on the Staten Island ferry and wave at the Statue of Liberty, stand outside the Met Museum’s admissions and peer in because you’re too cheap to pay $20 to go in (never was an art appreciater), rode a yellow cab driven by a mad Arab, spotted Christopher Walken stepping into his limo outside the Rockefellar Centre, and won lottery tickets to go see The Late Show with David Letterman LIVE!!!!!!!!! That was a highlight! And of course, what every loser ‘Friends’ fan like me does, stand outside places like ‘Pottery Barn’ and giggle.

But we also ate. And Ate. And Ate even more. The top 2?

1) Mama Empanada (in Clinton/Hell’s Kitchen) - Amazing Argentinean café serving filled empanadas, esp. good are the steak and cheese, the Viagra (seafood cocktail), and the Elvis (peanut butter, bananas and honey) for dessert. Their fruit cocktail is also amazing.

2) Pha-Nom Thai (Greenwich Village) = the chilli stuffed sea bass. That’s all I have to say. This restaurant does good stuff. Very innovative, very fresh.

I also visited the Journalism departments of NYU and Columbia, and shed a tear and a pout standing in front of Columbia’s beautiful library steps. I really liked both institutions, NYU and it being in the heart of Greenwich Village, probably my favourite neighbourhood in Manhattan, and of course, Columbia, its prestige, it’s beautiful Harlem campus, the name Pulitzer all over the damn place! Sigh! Someday....?

The best thing is, I think I felt at home here, because I didn’t feel like a foreigner (hmm!). I think how you sound makes a huge difference, when it comes to being or feeling accepted. And my accent is waaay more American than it is British (strangely so) so I felt more quickly at ease. And I didn’t even feel this ease in Boston strangely. New York definitely suits me.

corndogs, calzones, and quarters

Location: Brandeis University, Waltham, Massachussetts

The education system here is so different. Trying to get my head around state universities, community colleges, private schools, college funds, scholarships. In the UK it all boils down to 3 letters. And it being a liberal arts college, you have to do courses of all sorts, from gym classes to art appreciation. What you end up graduating in can be totally different to what you started out doing, they are so flexible here. I like that. Brandeis is so intense as well, compared to anything in London, its more like Oxford, yet its not even Ivy League. Nabilah has papers due every week, marks as much as 40% given for class participation, exams twice a semester.....and she's doing a BA!

This is my first experience of campus life, and I find it very isolated, especially if u don’t have a car. Not sure I could survive something like this, I've never lived outside a city. I'd love to do my masters here in the States, but it’d have to be somewhere like in New York, where people are everywhere, things are always moving, and you can walk to places.

Nabs has classes during the day so I went down to Boston myself one day. Sat around Harvard yard, ate my sandwich, watched people. I tried imagining myself surrounded by brilliant people, but it didn't work. I'm not sure what I was expecting, people with dictionaries for heads?

Shalom from Brandeis University

Location: Brandeis University, Waltham, Massachusetts

Been in the States for a week now.

Not much has happened in particular, me and Nabilah have mainly been chilling, catching up on waaaaay too much gossip, and eating until we want to burst.

I never gained the Freshers 15 back in London, but I’m guessing that I might compensate for that here in Brandeis. The portions served in this country are so big, we usually share one plate between ourselves. We have been cooking loads though, and we realised that we really enjoy doing simple things like that together. It may be our last time in a long time to get to chill out and just spend time, and Nabs is one of my bestest friends so I am really appreciating the quiet time together. I’ve been getting to know her friends, going to her classes, attending South Asian Soc meetings and friday Jumma prayers, and basically following her around everywhere and being a pest :P

We’ve been to Boston a few times so far, but there’s much more left to do. There’ll be a bit more traveling around from this weekend on, with trips to New York, Philly and Cape Cod planned. The first thing I thought of when we got to Harvard Square in Boston was that it looked more like London than anywhere else in the States. Makes sense, this being New England, and where the British landed first.

Staying with Nabs in Brandeis has certainly been interesting. If you didn’t know, it’s a Jewish college, and nearly everybody here is Jewish. I’m finding the dynamics of being a student here really interesting, but I shall not go into details lest I hurt sensitivities. Let’s just say we don’t discuss politics here. It’s ironic that I am from SOAS which is practically the antithesis of Brandeis.

We went to a campus bash on Friday evening, which was a lot of fun, albeit very very different to parties in London. Because the campus is in the middle of nowhere, most parties happen in the living rooms of dorms here. It’s all so very makeshift, I love it.

I’ve had to complete a long overdue article I’d been researching all of August, so I have been a tad lazy, doing not much else in the last week, I must admit. Nabs got me hooked on Grey’s Anatomy, and there is so much trash tv available to watch, it’s all I do some afternoons. Oops! (Sometimes it doesn't hurt to know about celebrity diets...)

On a happier note

Location: London, England

I passed my driving test yesterday!

After taking my first ever driving lesson on 24th July 2006, and (ahem) 39 hours more later - I passed on my first try with only 5 minors!! Suck on THAT! :P

Sooo, the summer has officially ended with a feeling of accomplishment. I got my license.... and I also got offered a job working for a local weekly in London, which unfortunately I couldn't accept, but the offer in itself definitely gives me much-needed hope for the future.

So, yes, the future does look bright.

ps. did I mention I got my driver's license...?

the beginning of the end

Location: London, England

So on Monday, I fly to the States, where I will be for the next 5 weeks. Monday also signifies my last real day as a London resident. When I fly back in on October 13th, I return on a tourist visa (I say that phrase with disdain and dismay).

The emotional aspect of last 30 days in London is something I would rather not talk about on a blog. What can you really say to capture having to leave a city that has been home for you since the age of 16, and not know when you will be back again? All I take consolation in is that I am not the only one, this is in fact, for many others like me, the new post-modern way of living: Move, settle, pack up, leave and repeat. I'm 22, nearly 23 and I still don't really know where I see as my real home or where it will end up being. My next destination certainly isn't my last, and I have a feeling that is how it will keep going for awhile.

In terms of the physical journey - I thought I would spend my last month re-visiting all my favourite haunts and doing a 'trip down memory lane' type of journey through London, but I've actually ended up being so busy taking on a billion different projects, that I have ended up unable to. In a way, the busy-ness has been a blessing, giving me less time to sit down, contemplate and realise how heartbreaking my next move is going to be. And in another way, it is also a blessing because a 'trip down memory lane' reeks of goodbyes and never-agains. And that I refuse to accept.

Ok I know sometimes in my attempt to sound deep - i come off leaving people a little confused as to what is actually happening. BASICALLY I am leaving London for a minimum of 1 year, maybe 2 - and my first stop will be in Singapore, where my parents live. I'm not sure as yet whether I am gonna stay put there, because I have a few other options e.g. Bangladesh or the Middle East for my AIESEC traineeship. We shall see as time passes. The future is uncertain - so I shall have to update bit by bit.

Why am I not staying in London? Well, mainly because if I want to pursue my career as a journalist, I can't do so in the UK as it doesn't give out work permits to journalists. Apparently, it isn't a 'shortage' sector, like teaching, and to be honest I will someday either kill myself or kill my poor students should i go into school teaching permanently. And apparently, it is easier to get a permit to do mind-numbing factory-line banking jobs, than it is to do high-flying, exciting journalistic work. Go figure.

So there it is: between choosing life in London and life as a journalist, I choose the latter.

Do you sense my bitterness?

Would you believe...

Location: London, England

Did I ever tell you how cool this job is? Only my 2nd day on a new work placement, and I'm already unable to get over how much I love doing what I do (or rather trying to do).

I shadowed a journalist in the office, following him to a press conference in the City. At the end of it, we're all handed goody bags, and as I peer inside mine, I see a Sony PSP box. I think to myself cautiously, "No...cant be." I overhear someone saying, "Ah yes, they're just empty boxes filled with cookies." There you go. It's just cookies...

As we're walking to the tube station, i overhear one journalist say to another, "Not bad hey? PSPs...Cant wait to go home and play on mine". My hands start trembling and my eyes grow wide. I have a Sony PSP in my hands??? Nooooo! Alone on the tube, and unable to hold my patience any longer, I rip open the goody bag, and lo and behold, IT REALLY IS A SONY PSP!!!

I could keep doing this unpaid placement forever like this....so long as I get my freebies. One to brighten each day of the week!